Going beyond basic needs?

I do believe in the law of attraction. I struggle with wanting more than my basic needs met. At the same time, I am exhausted of just barley getting by. And I cannot deny that in every pinch where it looked like everything was going to crash around me, something comes through that is unexpected and keeps things a float.. but just barely.

I try to visualize what I want.. but I honestly don't know what I want. I've been poor and in crisis mode my whole life. People say to dream big... but how do you do that when you have no clue what you want? When everything you try and envision just doesn't sit well within your heart?

I just want to pay off my land, fix up my house, grow my own food, raise my own meat, and have time to pursue a few hobbies.

But I look at my kids and feel bad that I don't want more.

Does any of this make sense?

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