My 3rd suicide attempt

I am a 15 year old female, I’ve been struggling with severe depression since my fourth grade. My first attempt was in my sixth grade, I took a large amount of sleeping pills and ended up in the hospital. promised I would never do it again, but I would try again a year or two later with a handful of random pills from the medicine cabinet, it never worked and I was so angry. This year in November I bought a large bottle of the strongest Tylenol I could find, I was so happy for the first time in a while thinking “this time it might actually work!” I waited till my parents were asleep and took about 50 pills. In about 30 minutes my stomach and chest were burning and I rushed to the toilet, vomiting my guts out, I’ve never experienced pain like that before. My parents called an ambulance for me and after two excruciating days of not being able to sleep, eat and constant dry heaving I was sent back home, promising I would never do anything like that ever again, but I just can’t seem to feel any better. My medication changed but I still feel no better than before, still having really bad depressive episodes. I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to keep feeling this way, it makes me believe god never meant for me to be on this earth. I don’t know what to do with myself.