Please help me choose between arma reforger, HLL, insurgency sandstorm.

I got these 3 games recommended the most in my last reddit post and now i have hard time deciding which one to buy.

I have seen the gameplays of all these but still confused. Basically i am not a ps player nor much of a gamer and now i have a friend who also want to play, so we decided to try out some free games like valorant, rivals, the finals and didnt like any of them because it was too unrealistic and valorant was kinda hard and too fast Paced i only had time to respwan just to get shot again.

Its mainly coz i didnt play it much bcoz i was not invested in it, i want realistic games at the same time i dont want to spend hours searching for an enemy just for someone to snipe me and start all over. Also i dont want games thats too fast which doesnt allow any time for strategy or teamwork.