I'm not proud to be an American, anyone else?

Disclaimer: Kind of a Rant

As a Black M(21), i live in a nation that seemingly hates everything about me and my people.

I'm in college working my ass off, landing myself thousands in debt just for some random on the internet to assume that any job i get it's only because of "DEI" and not because i happened to be a black guy that worked hard to become qualified to get the position.

I'm told that people in my community are struggling because we are lazy, and expect handouts instead of doing the work and building our own wealth despite historical records showing that my people were killed in the streets of Tulsa generating our own wealth, and safe black towns like Oscarville wiped from history for white recreation.

I'm expected to believe that i'm safe in a country where i can get judged just for wearing a hoodie, lynched for being "in the wrong neck of the woods" or killed by people who are supposed to protect me.

I live in a country where my people get ostracized, kicked out of school, and many other establishments for embracing and loving our hair.

I'm expected to believe my country cares about my people when Black Communities in Jackson, and Flint struggle with having clean water to drink.

I'm told to lighten up and stop playing the race card when over 50% of nearly 1000 fatalities happened as a result of a hurricane from over 20 years ago and poor infrastructure in poor areas which were predominantly black.

Most of my people live in impoverished hellscapes in the most populated region of the country with the worst infrastructure, education, and access to programs to change it or allow for them to leave and seek better opportunity.

Most of my people are driven to criminal activity, drug usage and drug selling, due to poor living conditions, homelessness, lack of finances among other things just to survive or they can die.

I live in a country that would rather hide the history of why my people are here to save face instead of teaching youth and future generations about it to learn and make progress.

I live in a country that would elect a White man who is a criminal over an educated and overqualified Black Woman to lead it.

I could keep going but i feel like the point is clear. How can i be proud to identify with a nation thats hated me, and people who look like me since its inception? I'm honestly so exhausted. If it wasn't for the fact that i'd be betraying my ancestors who fought to be recognized as people in this nation, I'd leave this country ASAP and as much as i love this country, the more i see how certain people actually feel about me and my community the more i feel like maybe my ancestors fought for nothing and that we should just leave and never come back.