My Mum blames being trans on Autism
I just got out of a heated debate with my mum over me wanting to change my name for my social transition and so i can go on to medical transition, now I've been out for almost two years using my preferred name with her and a select few families not been told or choosing not to use the name.
I approached her with the initial intent that i wanted to change my surname as its my dad's and i don't want to be associated with him at all. But i also want to change my first name as well, When she asked where this stemmed from i told her this was because to medically transition i need to have me officially ID's matching my social/trans identity. I told her for one my trans name (which she then proceeded to tell me i dont suit it and why do i even need to change it.) For context my deadname is Mark, its very clearly not a name that can be used androgynous-ly plus it was another reminder that it just not me.
From this she proceeds to go on about how there's clearly a similarity between people with autism and trans people telling me that i clearly am just not right in my head and i need a new lifestyle.
She then imposed on my all the things she did throughout her life and how i should not focus on my social life till im in my 30s (im 21 btw) saying that what i have is a mental illness and this should all just get sorted out by a therapist. I obviously said hell yeah i wanna see a therapist but she just doesn't understand why, I've told her ive been diagnosed with gender dysphoria and body dysmorphia. But she just clapped back with comments thaf everyone has issues with their bodies even saying that most girls have body dysmorphia despite saying that i will never look like or be a real women.
It killed me to lose my father of this but he was a prick so it wasnt too difficult, but to have my only other parent tell me I'm just too autistic that I'm trying to turn myself into a girl cos i have no purpose in life (her words) just screams to me that things are never gonna get better at home.