Being a stepparent is extremely hard

I’m spiraling right now. This past weekend, we didn’t have SK and went to go see Andrew Schulz. If you haven’t seen his comedy show, towards the end he mentions his having a kid journey and eventually shows a clip of his baby being born. Seeing my DH cry about it and instead of comforting him, I somehow make it about myself and get a reminder that he shared that intimate moment with someone else already. I share my feelings in attempt to shake them off but instead I get chastised about how it’s unfair to think about those things because I shared intimate moments with those before him too.

Rightfully so but I can’t help but think this life has given me many complex emotions. I have searched this sub many times about resentment, jealousy, “ours” baby (preparing for the future, and how to emotionally support my partner when it’s not his custody weekend.

I guess next step is therapy.