When will it be real again?

It's been a month since my "perception is reality, I am God, nothing really exists, life and death make no sense to me" trip I still cannot come back to "normal" , I sometimes feel a bit panicked, sometimes I experience strange synaesthesia that everything is everything. For example the corner of my bathroom is a street in my hometown. Has anyone else experienced this? Does it get better? Pleas say yes.

Background: I did too much within the span of a year. Had some bad trips, mostly amazing ones. My second last trip was too high (4) and I was panicking the whole time because I felt like I will lose my grasp on reality so I fought the trip , it was traumatic. My final trip, (which I call final boss trip because it's what it felt like, the conclusion to all the trips, nothing more left to explore) was a really low dose (1.2) it didn't matter much, I started feeling this strange discomfort that it's going to take me somewhere yet again I shouldn't go, to distract myself I started talking to my boyfriend. A thought experiment: what if two babies were left alone in a vacuum? We started talking about how they would create language, how they would codify sounds to collaborate to procure food better, how strongly they would he attached to the smells, sounds that come before wherever the food comes from, they will attach their own meaning to it, they will try to recognise patterns, like "when I cry I get food", we talked like this for a long time, building civilizations, societal norms, traditions why all of it exists for the purpose of survival and then....I asked we got so good at making sure our food is taken care of , our shelter is taken care of, and then we thought what else? Why? What kind of a living thing that relies on good and shelter to survive be so dissatisfied once it has it? It's almost as if once our survival is taken care of we are faced with the pointlessness of living. If I am not out looking for food what am I doing? We make things to fill out days with false meaning, sports, events, rituals to avoid facing the existential. But what kind of being will think about the existential at all? The kind of being that has something to do with the existential...I realised in my experience of life the moment I opened my eyes this universe was born, I felt like that's all this existence is, I felt like I could completely withered away out of existence in this instance if I chose, but I got up, went to the bathroom and screamed "no! I choose to be here! I want this!". I wanted it so bad, even waiting at a traffic light, it was so beautiful to experience whatever this is at all, but it felt like a choice. Problem is it's been one month, and I feel so scared, like I am just in some simulation, how do I know anything means anything? Even my memories? My relationships? I want to feel more grounded, I know whatever this is I have to operate as if this is "real" but how do I feel like it is meaningful? How do I feel like a little human again?