I Just Started My Year With a Relapse

The funny thing is that I was actually in a pretty good mood for most of tonight. I played games with my friends and listened to fun music. But then I saw something that triggered me deeply. I don’t even want to say what triggered me because it’s honestly so stupid and I’m embarrassed that I even got triggered by it. But it triggered me so much that I grabbed my razor I usually use for cutting, rushed to the bathroom and started cutting my thighs. I even made myself bleed quite a bit, and normally I don’t go deep with self-harming. It all just happened so fast. I’ve somewhat calmed down now but I feel so much shame. I relapsed two hours into the year. Great way to start.