[21F] I feel disgusted and distant from my boyfriend [23M] after we had sex – I don’t know how to be around him anymore

I (21F) have been with my boyfriend (23M) for about three months. Everything was going really well – he’s sweet, funny, and honestly, I felt really lucky to have met him. We hadn’t been sexually active yet because I told him I wanted to wait, and he respected that completely.

But a couple of weeks ago, things just… happened. It wasn’t planned at all – we were hanging out at his place, and one thing led to another. In the heat of the moment, I didn’t stop it. I thought I wanted it, but afterward, I felt this overwhelming sense of regret and discomfort.

Since then, something has shifted inside me. I feel disgusted when I think about him in that way. Every time he touches me or even sits too close, I feel this weird hatred bubbling up. I know he didn’t do anything wrong – he was gentle, respectful, and never pressured me. But now, I can’t look at him the same.

I grew up in a really conservative environment where sex was this taboo thing that “ruined” women if they engaged in it too soon. My family always made it sound like men only care about sex and once they get it, their true colors show. I thought I didn’t believe that anymore, but it’s like those thoughts flooded back the second we had sex.

The worst part is the irrational resentment I feel toward him – like I’m mad at him for something I agreed to. I catch myself avoiding him, canceling plans, and feeling tense when we’re alone. He’s noticed and asked if something’s wrong, but I brushed it off. I don’t even know how to explain it without sounding crazy.

I don’t want to sabotage this relationship because I genuinely care about him. But right now, I don’t even feel like I want to be around him, and I hate that I feel this way. Has anyone else experienced something like this? How do I deal with this without pushing him away completely?

TL;DR: I had unplanned sex with my boyfriend of three months, and now I feel disgusted and distant from him, even though he did nothing wrong. I think it’s tied to my conservative upbringing, but I don’t know how to stop feeling this way.(I’am from a 3rd world country)