Forced into Pregnancy

Hi,

My name is Margot, but everyone calls me Mary. About 3 months ago, my virginity was taken away from me by my own boyfriend and he recorded it all.

I’m 15, I know having a relationship at such a young age is weird. I totally agree, I had one, I paid the price. But honestly, I never had feelings for him, everything we did with each other was completely platonic.

To summarize all of what happened: He invited me to his house, along with some of his other friends while his parents were both at work. We did what all kids do, go to the park, play some games, and played a movie in the background while we did other things.

When everyone was beat-up, they all went home, except me. I stayed to help clean up, it was the most respectful thing to do, not just because we had a relationship together.

When we’d finish cleaning, I said I was about to leave, but he grabbed my arm, and sat me down on the couch. He put his hand on my thigh, and tried to kiss me. I told him; I wasn’t comfortable. But he shushed me, and continued. I’ll try not to get to graphic, but he forced himself onto me and physically abused me for about an hour, leading me into pregnancy.

When he stopped, he just told me to go home. While I was there on the floor, crying, hyperventilating, exhausted, and fully naked. But as he wished, I walked 25 minutes home, in pain.

When I arrived, no one but my 19 year old sister was there, because my mom had work. I told her everything, and she told my mom everything. Both of them were incredibly supportive throughout the whole process.

Things got sorted out with school, they permanently expelled him. But somehow, the video which was taken during my assault was shared within the majority of my school with 500+ students.

I skipped school for the next 2 in 1/2 weeks. I was scared about the way people would comment my body, the way people would tease me, harass me. All I wanted was for this whole situation to dissapear.

Although, when I came back, 95% of the other students were incredibly supportive. But, some saw it as a perfect opportunity to make me feel uncomfortable. They’d call me rude, degrading names, such as; slut, whore, etc.

Overtime, everything just caught up to me. I became suicidal. Harming myself any way I can, cuts, burns. I even tried to commit suicide on multiple occasions, but never succeeded.

Current day, I’m close to 3 months pregnant, but still deciding whether I keep, or lose the baby.