Losing too much weight and feeling devastated

Hi there! New mom here. I am feeling down tonight after stepping on the scale (what’s new) so I am looking for some support and guidance regarding too much weight loss I am currently experiencing. I am 7.5 months postpartum currently and I am currently still breastfeeding!

Background: I have always been a small woman who typically hovered around 110 lb in my mid twenties. I was not very active and generally didn’t worry about weight until 2021 when I was diagnosed with epilepsy and had to stop taking birth control while starting an anti-convulsant medication. I believe the hormonal switch and the new medication changed my ability to keep weight on. From then on I dropped a concerning amount of weight in a matter of weeks. I was so sick. After years of switching up medication, working with a gastro, and trying to build my strength back up, I was able to gain enough weight to become pregnant and successfully got to 95 lb. It seems silly admitting this, but this was a lot of work to get to. However, this was still significantly underweight and so during my pregnancy I pushed very hard to gain as much weight as possible and was able to gain 50 lb. I was ecstatic and so happy. She was born at a healthy weight (all I could ask for) and while my healing was brutal, I felt great knowing I might be able to keep weight on finally. Unfortunately, over the months due to breastfeeding, moving with baby, menstrual cycle returning, the weight slowly came off. I tried not to worry and increased my calories and snacking. But baby started her sleep regression and started some extra feeds at night lately…I just checked the scale tonight and I am officially under 100 lb and I am just devastated. Truly. I have been trying to so hard to keep the weight on and it must’ve not been enough.

I need tips, encouragement, anything really. Will the weight come back after I stop breastfeeding? I have tried researching but so much about postpartum weight info is geared towards losing weight. I’d like to get back on track. Women’s bodies are so incredible creating life and I do not want to feel ashamed as I know this body carried a healthy baby and has fed my little one so well. But I feel like a failure. It feels like I’m back at square one.