Why so many men are "behind" women socially and even intellectually

I was talking to a friend earlier about this, and I think the answer is just low empathy. Empathy isn't about "caring" about people or being nice to them in the traditional sense; that's sympathy's realm. Empathy is also about understanding people and knowing how to communicate with them. Having low empathy literally stunts you socially, and can therefore stunt you intellectually by putting up a huge roadblock in learning and exposing oneself to novel ideas and concepts because you lack the capacity to bother understanding another person's viewpoints on more than a surface level.

Edit: I missclicked and submit early oops