6:09 pm

I’m at my wits end. nothing is ever okay when it comes to me or my life. It’s always one damn thing after another. My life has never been easy, I’ve never had luck when it comes to life. Since elementary school I’ve had nothing but a tough time. And I am officially done. I honestly don’t care what happens to me anymore, I don’t care about my health, my mental health. I don’t care if I go to sleep one night and finally choke because of my sleep apnea. I just dont care. I’m done talking, I’m done crying, I’m done fighting. I’m done pretending like everything is going to be okay because nothing will ever be okay if you have any type of mental health issue. Depression is not curable, it’s manageable at best but that’s if you continue to go through trial and error until you can manage it. I have fibromyalgia, I’ve had it since I was 12 and nobody believed me when I said I was in such agonizing pain 24/7. I was finally diagnosed in December of 2023 - and of course the thing I have is {again} uncurable. I just don’t see the point in fighting anymore honestly. I’m 24 I should not have to fight so hard to be happy for one damn second. No matter how many people you cry to, or vent to or know you struggle and try to help none of those people or meds or therapists or anyone will ever be able to help you. Depression, anxiety, ptsd, fibromyalgia are never going away no matter how many medications I’m taking, no matter how many people I talk to, no matter the amount of therapy or doctors I see. I am stuck with these for the rest of my miserable life and I am done. I’m back to being nothing but the shell of someone who has the kindest heart you’ll ever meet and still somehow manages to have the worst life possible. I wouldn’t wish this life on my worst enemy and I hope to god nobody else has to ever deal with this type of life. Thanks for letting me rant. I’m sorry to everyone who sees this and knows exactly how it feels. We deserve so much better than what life is throwing our way.