I just dumped a really sweet guy, and I'm heartbroken.

I (28 F) know I made the right call, but he was a genuinely good man. Kind, funny, handsome, committed, intelligent, hard working, helpful around the house, and more. I thought about giving us a second chance so many times, but I knew that would just make it worse in the long run.

We met on a dating app, and there were some initial hurdles--we're different races, different religions (he's Hindu; I'm an atheist), and his family is much more conservative than mine. Neither of us cared about these differences, though, and we dated heavily for a month. By heavily, I mean: He told me he loved me on our third date, I met his family, and there was talk of marriage. The romance was a whirlwind, and for a second there, I thought I'd finally found my man.

But that's the problem with rushing into things. Sometimes you get so caught up in the excitement of a happy relationship that you fail to realize you two aren't actually all that happy. We argued almost every time we hung out. Usually about Men versus Women, for some ungodly reason. I don't know what he thought he was going to accomplish by constantly telling me how easy women have it, but what he did accomplish was pissing me off.

I actually agreed with him on some points, funnily enough. Like I said, we met on a dating app, and I know from talking to my guy friends that even getting a single match as a man is a Herculean feat. And if you do get a match, you'll generally text for a couple of days only to get ghosted. Women have it rough too, of course, what with dick pics and threats and creeps, but I'd rather wade through a sea of rude men than get nothing but radio silence. If he'd left it at that, maybe we could have worked it out, but he was relentless, almost obsessively so. On our first date he told me, "Women only pursue the top 10% of men," to which I said, "Then why am I on this date with you right now? Neither of us is top 10%. We're regular people, looking for a regular relationship." He'd also bring up the "fact" that women only date men who are over six feet tall … Yeah, I'm taller than him by several inches. Whenever he'd do this, I'd gesture between us and say, "What about us? What about me? I'm right here, disproving all these 'facts' about what women want." Then he'd tell me I'm obviously an exception. (Ladies, I'm not like other girls~, apparently.) I swear, sometimes it sounded like he wanted dating to be hopeless.

A few days ago, I decided I was going to break up with him. He left for a week-long work training today, and my original plan was to break up with him when he got back. We weren't going to be able to see or contact each other while he was away/busy, so I figured after a week apart, it'd be easier. I was going to tell him we're not quite right for each other, and it's no one's fault. It's better we figured it out now before we wasted months or years of our lives on a relationship that's close but just shy of perfect. Or worse, got married only to realize it's not working.

Well, that all went to shit when we were at dinner last night, and he again brought up how life is so much harder for men than women. I admit it: I fucking snapped. We started arguing as we drove back to my house, and by the time we got there, I told him to leave. It was ugly. He cried; I cried; he begged me to let him stay and to just come cuddle with him and let this blow over. I was tempted, because he's really great in every other way, but as the person with more relationship experience, I knew what I had to do. I said, "One of the reasons why this sucks so much is because you and I are almost right for each other. If I were 5 years younger, I probably would have stuck it out with you. I've known people who stayed in so-so relationships for years because there were just enough good things to balance out the bad. But I'm a grown woman now, and I can tell when something isn't quite right." I also said something along the lines of, "You keep saying I'm the exception to all these rules about women, but what happens when I stop being the exception? What happens when I do something you don't like, and you decide that I'm exactly like other women, actually?" He argued with me, but when I asked him point-blank if he thought I was wrong about us being "close but not quite there," he admitted that he agreed. Then he packed up his stuff and left.

To make all of this worse, I was his first everything. His first kiss. His first sexual partner. His first real girlfriend. The first girl to meet his family, and spend the night, which was a huge deal. All of that. And now I've broken his heart. He sent me a really sweet goodbye text, saying he's glad I was his first in so many ways and that he wishes me well, and I feel like a monster. I can't help wondering if I did the right thing.