What's up with Pete's Za?

Alright, I need to get this off my chest because this is beyond messed up. Last night, I decided to treat myself to some good ol’ pizza from Pete’s Za. I was starving, so I went all in—two large pizzas, one meat lover’s and one buffalo chicken. Ate them both over the course of the evening, no regrets at the time.

Fast forward a few hours, I’m vibing on Discord, chatting with my kitten (if you know, you know 😉). Things escalate, we’re deep into e-romance mode, the kind of degeneracy that requires noise suppression. Long story short, the deed gets done, and out of sheer curiosity (or muscle memory at this point), I decide to give it a little taste test.

Instant regret.

It was like licking a rusty coin that had been dipped in expired ranch dressing. I don’t know if Pete’s Za loaded their sauce with something weird, but my essence tasted straight-up spoiled, like someone had been marinating a battery in my body. I gagged so hard I almost threw up.

Now, I’ve had some questionable dietary choices before, but nothing has ever had this kind of catastrophic effect on me. I checked the ingredients on their website, and nothing seemed out of the ordinary, but something in those pizzas fundamentally altered my chemistry.

So yeah, 0/10 would not recommend Pete’s Za unless you’re trying to experience biological warfare in your own body. Has anyone else had this happen? Is this a known phenomenon?? Or am I just cursed now??