Bargaining phase of grief

I'm not really sure what to make of this "bargaining phase" I am going through to make deals to make myself feel better, trying to trade one thing for another. It's like I am trying to rationalize the pain away. It goes something like this:

"Well I don't know exactly what other health conditions my cat may have had (aside from his diagnosis, encephalitis, which I do know). Maybe he had undiagnosed diabetes. Maybe he had been sick for a longer time than I realized, and his suffering is now ended."

"Other people only had five years with their cat. I should just be greatful I had ten."

"He is better off without me."

"A lot of pet tragedies are worse than mine. This wasn't as bad as others (yes it was)."

"It is better that he died before me, because if I died first there would be no one to take care of him "

"There are many animals who suffer flea induced or tick paralysis in the wilderness. It paralyzed them and they cannot move to get food or water and they died. I rescued Bibbs from that. He might have died in his first year of life."

None of these rationalizations actually work. I am pretty sure the only thing that will help is getting a new cat or two (two).

I also experienced the anger part of grief. Being angry at death. Being angry at the vet for greed (high quantity low quality care). For the moment my entire world view has changed. I'm doing very little to move forward. I need to get my tire repaired which I blew out on the way to the vet (it is plugged), get cheaper car insurance, pay my credit card bills. I need to go grocery shopping but all I do is drive a short distance to the convenience store near my home for stuff I need, like coffee, and it's expensive.