Drowning in new parenthood

I’ll start off by saying this is a semi-vent post but advice or words of solidarity are welcomed. I am trying so hard to make life make sense right now. FOR CONTEXT: My daughter will be 8 months at the end of this week. Her temperament has always been on the fussy/clingy side. I also exclusively breastfeed. I pump on the side here and there if I’m going to be away for more than 2 hours. I was already a stay at home mom when my wife lost her job two weeks before Christmas. The first two weeks we were kinda just coasting and not really able to keep track of the days. We’d wake up early (really when the baby wakes up around 7:30/8:00) and before we know it it’s the middle of the day and we don’t know where the time went. I decided that we needed to create a schedule/ routine because we’d often say “we need to do a load of laundry today” or “we got to find time to sweep today” (we have a magnetic calendar on our fridge and actually have days to do chores written down) but we’d either forget or remember much later in the evening and put it off for the next day. So instead I wrote down a schedule with time slots and shared it with my wife via the notes app so she can make changes etc. The schedule included the times of our daughters naps (it still varies but we can time it within the hour), time for us to make breakfast, do a chore or two, time to make/ eat lunch, and personal time. It was okay for the first week and I was open to the times varying and changing until we fell off for a day or two. The problem is that it has been so hard to get back on track and I am mentally exhausted. Let me explain. My wife has ADD/ADHD and it’s extremely hard for her to remember things. In the beginning of our relationship (5 years ago) I didn’t really understand but over time I realized that she truly can’t help it. And I can give her credit because she does sometimes remember things and is on top of a few things but it’s not enough for everything we have going on. Most of the time if I don’t remember something we need to do first it gets overlooked or we end up remembering at the same time but by then it’s too late. If I can give a percentage it’s 70/30 or more often 60/40. For example, we knew we were going to lose our health insurance at the end of last month and my wife takes medicine for a very important health condition she has, she forgot to refill the prescription in which she only had a few more doses and I was upset at myself that I didn’t remember to remind my wife BEFORE our insurance ended. I can’t really share this with my wife because I don’t want her to feel bad about something she can’t control. I didn’t grow up type A but I feel like I need to have things written down and planned out because I have anxiety and I’m no longer able to handle chaos. Our daughter being clingy also makes it hard because she wants to be held all the time. We put her in a bouncer and a playpen sometimes but she doesn’t stay in it long enough without crying hard. I also don’t baby wear anymore because she is a bigger baby and quickly outgrew the carrier we had. We currently co-sleep with our daughter but I told my wife that we need to figure out another sleeping arrangement because she’s getting bigger and there isn’t much room. We agreed on bringing her Cribette in the room because putting her in the crib alone in her own room when all she’s known is sleeping with us feels cruel. All we have to do is take the bassinet down and bring in the Cribette. We spoke about that 5 days ago and we keep on forgetting to do it. So here I am in the middle of the night typing this post and holding my daughter as she sleeps, with the worst anxiety wondering if tomorrow will be like every other day. If you have made it this far thanks for coming to my RedTalk.