Nakakaputangina

To add context: me and my mom's brother had a falling out after niya kami (me and my cousin) sampal sampalin at ambahan ng suntok 2 years ago over something we didn't even have anything to do with.

Si Mama, she still thinks na dapat kalimutan na namin yung nangyari and patawarin siya kasi mas matanda and Bata pa lang kami. Pero no matter how much na sabi ng mama ko saamin ng ganon we just can't do it. Hindi namin kaya kasi everytime na nababanggit pangalan niya napupuno kami ng galit.

Just this Friday, kinausap ulit ako ni mama tungkol don and told me to say hi to him in chat since he's abroad. I didn't say anything but I was hurt when a part of the conversation came:

My mama said something along the lines of, "Tao lang naman siya, kung ano mang nagawa niya sainyo"

I just replied na Tao rin naman kami ng pinsan ko and then after that hindi na ako kumibo and nag pretend na lang ako na hindi ko naririnig sinasabi niya. Asshole move, I know.

Kanina lang my mama brought the topic up again as I was cleaning. She asked me if I talked to him yet and I just stared at her and left. His birthday is near Ata. I don't know, I never really cared about learning his birthday or kahit ano man. Nakakaputangina lalo na kung sailing mong mama hindi ka maintindihan I want to fucking cry and tell her na hinding hindi na makakatikim sakin ng bati or kahit anong salita saakin yung kapatid niya. Not ever. Kahit lumuhod pa siya sa uling na mainit.