Fear of death:(?

Hi everyone, this is my first time ever I visit this community.

I’m a 25-year-old male. Since I was 16 I started experiencing different OCD symptoms. Thankfully, I’ve managed to overcome most of them, but one remains: an intense fear of death. The thoughts of death and burial weigh heavily on my heart, and I worry about them constantly.

A key pattern I’ve noticed is that these symptoms mainly occur during the winter season, almost every year, lasting for 2-3 months. During these episodes, I lose the ability to enjoy things that usually make me happy. I wake up and go to sleep feeling depressed and anxious.

I understand that seeing a psychiatrist is a common recommendation, but I have a major concern: I am in the medical field and currently live in a third-world country. I’m in the middle of applying for jobs, and I fear that if my employer discovers I’m taking psychiatric medication, I could be rejected from the job (they get access to my medical conditions…)

This is my first time EVER opening up about this, and I’d truly appreciate any advice or guidance!!

I used Chatgpt to refine my words because english is not my first language ^{^}