I was sexually harassed by a current Harvard-Yenching Visiting Scholar in 2021

I have resolved to share my personal experience here on Reddit, departing from the anonymity of forums in my home country. It seems there is no effective way to expose his actions or hold him accountable for his despicable behavior. While I am fully aware that sharing my story on Reddit may achieve little, I feel compelled to at least see what might come of it.

I graduated from the same department at our university in June 2019, and "Male A" only assumed the role of lecturer the following month, in July. I first encountered him at a house event he hosted for students enrolled in one of his courses during the fall of 2021. My invitation came by virtue of my partner, whose Master’s advisor happened to be Male A. That evening, I was also introduced to his wife, a fellow alumnus. Nothing of particular note or discomfort occurred that night.

On my partner's birthday later that year, we abandoned our planned celebration to accept an invitation from Male A to a whiskey bar. My partner, for reasons tied to conventional—and frankly outdated—cultural norms, felt unable to decline. By the time we arrived, it was already 9:30 PM. Male A mentioned that his wife would join us after work and encouraged us to sample an array of drinks. When his wife finally arrived, the four of us sat together, though the atmosphere was undeniably awkward. Male A posed invasive, pointed questions about my personal life and career choices, leaving me feeling as though I was being unfairly judged. At one point, emboldened by his presumptions about me, he even ventured unsolicited commentary on my relationship. The accumulating tension might well have driven me to leave, yet I stayed.

Perhaps sensing the strain, Male A shifted the conversation to topics I found wholly uninteresting. By this time, he had clearly had more than enough to drink—his mannerisms left no doubt. His speech became more animated, and then, without warning, he looked me directly in the eyes, said something I can no longer recall, and placed his hand on my lap. Twice.

I froze, as I have in every moment of violation I’ve endured before. Panic surged, but I recoiled instead of making a scene. His wife, seated with us, witnessed everything. It was she who admonished him—not in the way I might have wished, but she spoke up nonetheless. If this account were ever challenged in court, I suspect she would stand against me, a witness for his defense. I think she said something along the lines of, “You need to set boundaries with women.”

By the time I fully understood my legal recourse under my country’s laws, the window to file a claim for sexual harassment had already closed. Even then, I had known the deadline loomed but chose silence to avoid jeopardizing my partner’s studies and career—sacrifices I could not bear to impose on someone who has been nothing but loving and supportive of me throughout the years.