This is stupid, so freaking stupid

I’ve never had sooo much food go bad before in my life. And I have ADHD, my food goes forgotten and rotten pretty often 🙄. But this is beyond ADHD tax.

There’s only so many ways I can overcome my executive dysfunction to eat such a strict diet.

I’m fighting untreatable acid reflux and GD all at once. One thing that works one day does not work the next. If it doesn’t spike my sugar, it has my chest on fire. If it doesn’t cause me acid reflux, it has my numbers high.

My brain does not work on a tight schedule so this “set an alarm and eat at the same time” bullshit is annoying. My days aren’t the same! I forget that the alarm even went off. I’ve tried meal planning 82,000 times.

I already suffered w/ insomnia pre-pregnancy but the insomnia now is atrocious! I’m currently getting 3-4 hours of sleep at a time and it’s near impossible for me to fast 8 hours without getting hypoglycemic. I wake up after a few hours ravenous and on the verge of being sick. I’m doing all the things and the things are freaking stupid.

My GD team is very one size fits all. How are you a medical professional that can’t listen to a patient? And what learning are they doing to adjust to how they recommend things and work with neurodivergent patients in particular?

I don’t even want to eat at this point, every bite is painful. Either because it’s bland and the same damn thing everyday or because my chest is on fire and my food is ready to come through my nose.

I always wanted a natural birth as much as medically possible but at this point, I’d be happy if they could get this placenta out of me by 37 weeks on the dot. I feel like I’m in jail.

I HATE IT HERE!

(Please don’t offer me any advice and I’m not asking for suggestions, I’m tired of hearing people advise things that I’ve already tried. I’m just ranting bc I’m ready to rip my hair out!)