no, they won't change
little important reminder:
a relationship with a person who has BDP is not a classic relationship and therefore one should not think and react as in a "normal" relationship
recovery techniques won't work
techniques to appease the relationship will not work
a breakup will never happen in the classic way
what makes sense to you won't make sense to them
the love you feel or hope for won't happen
they have a personality disorder and the way they are is THEIR personality and asking them to change would be the same as asking them to die
imagine being asked to change your personality... well for them it's the same thing
they live like that and therapy will only give them the means to adapt to the majority but the personality will be the same.
we must realize this to move forward