I asked ChatGPT about avoidants and the love bombing stage and this is the answer

I was curious what ChatGPT will tell me about this specific question and I must admit the answer is on point:

"People with an avoidant attachment style may engage in love bombing at the beginning of a relationship as a way to manage their own conflicting desires for intimacy and independence. Here's why that might happen:

  1. Fear of Rejection or Abandonment: Even though avoidantly attached individuals often seem emotionally distant, they can still deeply fear rejection or abandonment. In the early stages of a relationship, they may overcompensate by love bombing (excessive attention, flattery, or affection) to make sure the other person feels secure and invested, thinking that this will protect them from being rejected.
  2. Testing the Waters: Love bombing can be a way to "test" the other person's commitment and interest without directly exposing their vulnerability. By being overly affectionate, they might be seeking validation or reassurance that the other person won't abandon them.
  3. Idealization Phase: At the start of a relationship, avoidantly attached individuals might idealize the other person as a way to bypass their internal fear of intimacy. They may get caught up in the fantasy of the relationship and show extreme affection, hoping to create a sense of connection without actually confronting their deeper fear of closeness.
  4. Pushing Away Vulnerability: For someone with avoidant attachment, intimacy can feel suffocating or overwhelming. By love bombing at the start, they may be trying to quickly establish a sense of closeness that then allows them to later distance themselves without feeling like they’ve been too emotionally vulnerable.
  5. Control of the Relationship Dynamics: Some individuals with avoidant attachment may use love bombing as a tool for controlling the pace of the relationship. By overwhelming the other person with affection, they set the tone for the relationship and can later pull back if they feel it is getting too intense or emotionally demanding.

After this initial phase, when the intensity of love bombing fades, avoidant individuals may become more distant or withdrawn, which can cause confusion in their partners. This cycle of idealization and distancing is a common pattern in avoidant attachment dynamics."