Unable to mentally visualize with complete clarity

Unable to mentally visualize with clarity

I know this post seems redundant but hear me out please. I suffer with OCD (diagnosed) and have been living with it for 5 years. I have experienced high amounts of anxiety and stress since. In July last year, I was repeating a phrase mentally (i also have comprehension struggles so I might have to re-read or restate something in order to comprehend it. I was also talking in my head for 2 months a lot with not many breaks and i was ruminating a lot. I had a cognitive overload where it felt like my mind went blank in that moment and I wasn’t able to say anything further mentally. I felt like my mind reset itself and since then it’s been hard to visualize things mentally, especially in detailed. I can do it a little but it’s very generic and seeing looking at an actual picture usually helps. I used to have this huge imagination and photographic memory as a kid so it wouldn’t make sense for me to have Aphantasia. I always was able to visualize things in my head. I can’t even force myself to just sit and concentrate mentally on the visualization because it just causes more tension, worry, and stress. This is driving me insane. My therapist hasn’t really said anything about it despite my many attempts at informing them on this. And I’m very upset because my doctor’s office has not been answering at all and the hospital is expensive and flooded with people. Please help? I just want to be able to mentally visualize again. This is making me worry.

Tldr; i’m having trouble mentally visualizing and I don’t know why. It’s driving me nuts. I hope it’s not Aphantasia.